Back to the mundane - Vacation Report (First of who knows?)

So I went on vacation, and that’s why you haven’t seen anything posted here for awhile.

Thanks to all those who have visited. Hello James, nice to see you.

Let me give you a summary of my vacation, since it seems like the thing to write about.

Tam and I went to Edmonton, Alberta and to Prince George, British Columbia. (Since I did not know Canadian Geography before marrying a Canadian, here’s a map.)

If you have not heard me say it yet, let me say it now… I hate Chicago airports. They are the greatest traveling vortex that I am aware of. They lose you luggage, they delay all flights out, they close all flights in (and usually this is not your final destination, I mean who wants to go to Chicago?), the food is more overpriced than most airports overpricing, and usually the food is dry and over cooked at best, etc, etc. K… I’m done.

So yeah, they lost 15 people’s luggage. Not to mention they lost another piece of our luggage on the way home, but let me not get ahead of myself.

If you have not had the pleasure of attempting to go through customs… well I hope you never have to. That being said, this time was actually very smooth, now that Tam has her Green Card. That’s right, the easy-access pass. However, they have a magnetic strip on there that pretty much has its own polar force. We have to keep it in a special case so that Tammy’s purse doesn’t randomly fly through the air, hitting some poor bystander as it zooms toward some alluring magnetic machinery. I once got pinned to an MRI machine, but that’s another story.

“Where were you born?”
“Where do you live?”
“Business or pleasure?”
“Do you have the right papers?”
“Where are you going?”
“How long will you be stayin?”
“Do you have more than $10,000 on you?”
“Are you bringing any gifts in more than $60?”

I fight every temptation to give some funny answer, because they can and will arbitrarily send you back to the States.

We finally get through Customs, and the line for lost luggage, and there we meet our dear Jordan, Doralynne, and little Amos, who have been waiting for over an hour for us. So we hug, laugh, pack up and enjoy our 45 min. ride home, stopping of course for some Tim Horton’s coffee, because although it’s 11pm, we will be greeted by Mark, Belinda, and Jody who we will likely visit with till 3am.

Funny side note… only in Canada. They have these roadside checks. “Have you had anything to drink tonight, eh? (Their statements are phrased in interrogatives, and so their questions are usually double interrogatives) And so we say, “Only Coffee?” and they reply, “Well that’s great! Here is a beg (They mean bag) of gifts, just saying that we appreciate your efforts to not drink and drive, eh?” The bag was full of goodies... pen, magnet ( we kept it away from Tam's green card), notepad, and what-not.

Here in New York it’s like,
“You been drinkin’ haven’t chya!”
“No officer.”
“Don’t lie to me!” (flash light in your face).
“No, I haven’t been.”
“You mean, ‘No, sir’!”
“Right, No, sir.”
“Here. Breathe into this.” (She shoves some pipe in your mouth)
“Well, I guess 0.001 disqualifies you… this time! Go on.”

*sigh… gotta love Canada

(…to be continued)